I Love You, Goodbye

His heart felt as if it were going to die right within his chest and poison him forever.
Leaving her was turning out to be the hardest thing he has ever done.
He wished he could be the one to make her dreams come true but he just was not the right man for the job. This realization struck him hard because this little slip of a woman was his dream.
The situation was just too far fetched and out of his wheel house to even deal with.
He knew with the way things were he could never completely let go and love her as she deserved. The situation would not allow him to relax and let his guard down.
And that would make him hold back, which was not what she deserved.
A soft sigh and he looked out over all the moving boxes in various states of packing.
This was what he wanted right?
Shaking his head to clear his thoughts he began packing once again.
A song came on the radio and through his musings the words came to him.
He stopped and began to listen.
'Leaving someone when you love someone is the hardest thing to do when you love someone as much as I love you.'
He stood and stared down at his phone, needing to see who this was by.
The hairs stood on his arms and he knew this said what he needed to say.
His courage was lacking to tell her how he felt face to face. His biggest fear is that she could change his mind. She would change his mind....and he knew he could not stay.
He pulled up the lyrics on the computer and wrote them down. This is how he could say what he needed to say.
He shook his head with sadness in his heart, downed his beer and went back to packing.

Before he was to leave they sat down to dinner.
Drinking, eating, talking and laughing was what they loved to do.
There she was, smiling up at him with adoration and when she did that it always made him feel warm inside. He loved her smile and sparkling green eyes. Such a gorgeous little thing.
Not only was she beautiful she was the kindest soul he had ever met.
She was real and honest and present. It blew him away.
But even with all of that, he could not stay.
He would hit the road, leaving this place right after they were done.

He had written the lyrics to the song on a pretty card he found.
He told her he loved her. He told her how highly he thought of her. He told her that he was sorry for leaving her but it was for the best.
Then he let the song say the rest.

He  looked in his rear view mirror and saw her sitting in her car reading the card as he drove away.
His heart broke in two as he broke hers at that moment.
Tears streamed down his face as he left for his new life.