The Worst Part

I worried over you.
I wanted you to be safe and happy.
You were always on my mind but I never told you that.
Oh no, that would not be a good thing.
I would see the sideways glance from you of worry cause you did not want me the way I wanted you.
I was a friend. Just a friend and no more.
I could not help to fall for you.
Do you really blame me? Do you?

I would have stayed at your side as your friend but  you began putting those walls up.
I felt as if I had done some wrong to now not be able to just talk to you as we did before.
Now the boundaries are there.
My mind goes back to the silliness that I displayed.
I remember trying to just tell you how I felt with out being too obvious.
I just wanted to tell you that I cared. You were important to me.
I think I broke the connection for it may be that you do not care for me the same.

So I close my eyes and go to the dream world where we are together, having fun and laughing.
Then I realize I am dreaming over something that is so far fetched.
Why would you even want me? I am not even in your league. I am so far beneath you that I cannot see the moon through the sun.

I sit and ponder how to keep our friendship alive with out my heart breaking.
I ponder how we could just be there and I could just accept whatever you present.

And the worst part of it all is that I'm wasting all my time pondering over you
when I know your thoughts never ponder over me.