Too Attached

I got way too attached to you.

Talking to you every day. Seeing your smile. Watching those blue eyes light up with laughter.
Having our inside jokes.
All of it built within me to a place where I could not help but fall for you.
When I told you my secret and you did not walk away I felt hope.
When you pulled back once but then was again at my doorstep the hope turned into happiness.

Now I worry my happiness is about to be shattered by the reality of how  you feel.

I know I am not what you want.
I wish I was, Goddess, I do.
But I know I am nothing special.
You need special because you are so very special.
I am aching for I know this will all fade backwards into something that barely resembles what we have had.
You will do this to protect yourself.
To protect me for I know you care. But not like I do for you.
For a moment I might think you love me too.
You can't step into this unique situation and not have your dreams come true.
If that was the case, then I would understand.

But my bruised and battered heart has a hard time thinking anything good.

I am used to being ignored, walked away from and just never being good enough.

I will get better.

I will still be there for you.
I will still be your friend.