But There's Just Something

   "But there's just something about him that made me like him ever since the day I met him. There was something about him that made me go absolutely crazy." she said as she stared into her coffee cup.

"What was the something?" her friend asked as he sipped his coffee.

    She looked up and sighed, her green gaze shifting to a far away gaze as she remembered.
    "It was the way he watched me with intensity, like every word I said mattered, like every movement was important. I felt he was present when we spoke and then there was the intense magnetism. It was something I had never felt before in my life. Nervous energy where I wanted to impress him to the point where he lost control. And he did. So did I. I can't even look at him now without my stomach flipping over with anticipation, desire and fear."
She said softly and brought her gaze to her cup once again. She could feel her cheeks redden with her admissions for she did feel like a foolish girl.

"Why fear?" Her friend asked gently.

"Because....I am so afraid that he will finally say to me what I don't want to hear...." her voice had dropped to a whisper and she peeked up at her friend who was staring at her with expectation.

He leaned forward and said, "What....what is it you don't want to hear?"

"I love you." her whisper was strained and she felt the tears threaten.

"Why is that bad? Isn't that what you want?"

One tear slid down her cheek as she looked at her friend, pain so great radiated from her, he scooted closer and said softly. "What...you can tell me...what is it?"

"I fear that because I will say it back and we cannot be together the way we want and then where would we be?"

The tear slid off her cheek to fall to the napkin on her lap. It spread out within the white, woven paper to disappear but the pain remained.