Please

  This time she wanted to come out on top. Was that a selfish wish? There were days she felt as if wanting what she wanted was a selfish act. She felt that her life was only supposed to be filled with second place finishes and left behind memories.
  Picking up the blue pen she wrote another please among the other multicolored words on the napkin before her.
  Please, over and over again she wrote on the white napkin, the green, blue, purple, red and black ink sinking through and spreading the words into fat characters. The ink gave each please its own life and she looked over each word, thinking of it as an individual entity that had its own little life story to tell.
Her finger ran over a curly purple please and this one was a happy please as it was dwelling in a good memory and wanted more of that experience. The blocky, please underneath the purple one was black as night. It seemed to dwell within its own darkness and painful memories. This was a please that needed to be moved into the purple haze.

  Her gaze lifted to look out the coffee shop window and she wondered what she needed to do now. She wanted to get on with life but something kept her in this place. This stuck, dark and sometimes bright life where she was just a passing fancy. She felt alarm when she could not feel anymore, no sorrow nor real joy touched her soul and then she found herself unable to dream. Night was filled with darkness and quiet. It was as if she stepped off the world into some dark abyss of sadness.

  The napkin represented her heartfelt desire to be found worth by someone.
 
  "Please, let me get what I want this time." she whispered softly to the napkin. Then she rose and left the shop.

   The napkin lay in the center of the table, a testament to her will to continue onward. To never forget the one she desired above all else but she would go forth with her wishes, her day dreams and her hope that someday she would get what she wanted.